by Susan Gold
In my recent life, I have been dialoguing with an aspect of myself that I have come to call the “grinch”! My grinch speaks in a little voice of discontent and bitterness, finding dissatisfaction in a number of current issues. It seems no matter how much attention I give to this little voice, or how many prayers I say, or how much forgiveness I bring, my grinch is like that bad penny that just keeps coming back again.
Today I called to my grinch and set it in front of me, and asked it to tell me it’s story. “Where are you from” I asked. “I don’t know” it replied. “Oh, well someone does” I said. As I began to wonder who that person might be who knows the origin of my little grinch, the images of some of the women in my ancestry began to appear in my mind’s eye. My maternal grandmother appeared and I was reminded that she had her gallbladder removed, and also her left breast, only to learn afterward that the surgery was unnecessary. Her mother, my great maternal grandmother, lost her husband in a tragic accident and she was called to the scene to identify his remains. My paternal grandmother, mother of 5 children, also lost her husband, a fireman, to a fire at an early age. There are many opportunities and reasons for me to be the carrier of ancestral discontent and bitterness, while in my own life my husband Warren passed on at the age of 54. I was just 49 at the time.
These are by no means inconsequential life experiences, and undoubtedly every family suffers these kinds of tragic challenges. It is clear that my little grinch has a great legacy of discontent to complain about. In my study of the Five Element Theory of Chinese Medicine I learned that the gallbladder is associated with the emotion of bitterness. I have also learned that unresolved issues and emotions in generations past may present in current generations for healing and transformation. Although this reality may present difficulties for members of the current generation, it can also be regarded as a great privilege when one is given the opportunity to engage in healing that effects past, present and future generations.
Having made so many attempts to brighten the outlook of my little grinch and convince it to speak in terms of acceptance without success, I decided to give singing a try. Unless I’m singing a very sad song, singing almost always makes me feel better. I began toning for my little friend, and telling it that I was giving it a promotion from the voice of bitterness in my gallbladder to a position of great prominence in the light of love. As I continued to sing to it, I’m pretty sure I felt the vibration of its bitterness begin to shift.
It is interesting to note that our beloved Rev. Misa is a Sound Healer. When Rev. Misa sings, the magic of healing is present. I have witnessed the beauty and goodness of her songs. You can check out her work with sound healing at her website http://misahopkins.com/. The elder of our Water Ceremony, Ariann Thomas practices an ancient ritual of ancestral clearing, the benefits of which I have also witnessed. Her website is http://ancestrallineageclearing.com/. These are two wonderful and sacred tools that can help each of us succeed in the healing that we have come to complete in this lifetime.
When things get tough, I highly recommend that you include singing as one of your sacred tools of transformation.