One of my readers asked me to clarify how it is that love dissolves discomfort and pain.
She has known love as a high vibration to be felt when focusing on things you wish to create, but not for attending to lower vibrational energies like discomfort, illness, difficult emotions etc.
I was confused about this for some time too, so I appreciated her question. I’d like to share with you what I discovered.
Many of us learned growing up that God is displeased with you when you are bad; and therefore when you do something bad, you are unworthy of God’s love.
When God is pleased with you; however, you are worthy of God’s love.
With this thinking, we have turned Divine love into reinforcement or withholding.
Or in other words—you get the love when you do it right, but you don’t when you do it wrong.
Translate this into energy work and it looks like this: Give love to those things that feel right or good to you and give nothing to those things that feel wrong or bad to you.
It’s an interesting premise…
… but that’s not actually how Divine love works.
The Divine doesn’t love you only when you get it right. The Divine doesn’t love you when you are in a high vibrational field and ignore you or withhold love when you are in a lower vibrational field.
We know this, but it is easy to get lost in the programming from our childhoods and previous lives.
Divine love is constant and ever present throughout all life.
It is the person who may be feeling worthy or unworthy of that love. If you are not feeling Divine love, your humanness might be getting in the way.
Unworthiness is an indication that you probably have an unmet emotional need—a need to be heard, recognized, seen, respected, wanted, appreciated and more. These needs are behind your uncomfortable feelings.
Those unmet needs get met through Holding ourselves in loving compassion.
As you Hold your discomfort (uncomfortable feelings) in love, your unmet needs become met. You feel seen, heard, respected, wanted, and so on. Now you feel worthy once again to feel deeper levels of Divine love.
Consider this story in regard to Holding your discomforts in compassion.
A child decides to climb a tree, but climbs out onto an unstable limb. The child falls to the ground and scrapes up his hands and knees. (Fortunately, he wasn’t any higher up and the injuries aren’t very serious.)
The child is crying and runs into the house. What is the first thing he wants?
Does he want to be scolded for taking such a risk? Does he want the wounds to be cleaned and bandaged. Not yet!
The first thing he wants is for someone to Hold him in love! He wants a hug or a kiss. He wants compassion. In some communities, love might take the form of sympathy.
In some communities, love might be expressed as laughter about how funny life can be (laughing with him about life, not at him as though he is weak). In either of those cases, the child experiences some form of compassion for the discomfort he is feeling.
Once he has experienced love, he is ready for the task of cleaning and bandaging the wound. Then, and only then, is he able to consider how he might have made a different choice that would have prevented an injury (preferably still with love and kindness).
Holding is how we make the learning easier
We don’t think of a child falling and injuring himself as a lower vibrational act, do we? It might not be the smartest choice the child makes in his life. He might even do it again in his need to explore his edges. He isn’t bad. He isn’t unworthy of love. He is learning about himself in relationship to life.
In an adult’s love, care and coaching, he learns to make better choices for himself. He can learn to take smart and safe risks, enjoying the thrill, while still keeping himself safe. In this, he discovers how to create a life of joy.
It is love that the child needs in order to heal and learn, and it is love that you need to heal physical or emotional wounds, or limiting beliefs.
Love is constant. When you are suffering or feeling limited, anxious, stuck or afraid, if you pause for a moment and Hold yourself in compassion, the love in your compassion will dissolve your fear, bolster your courage, and provide clarity.
You then truly free to manifest the life you desire.
To understand this process even better, I recommend reading my book, Sacred Feminine Awakening: The Emergence of Compassion. I go into much greater detail about how Holding in love and compassion works to transform your life.